What's the difference between sex therapy, couples therapy, and regular therapy?

Regular talk therapy covers a broad range of mental health concerns (anxiety, depression, trauma, life transitions, and more). Most therapists are generalists, and while some are comfortable discussing relationships or sexuality, very few have specialized training in those areas. If sex or intimacy comes up in a general therapy session, it's often addressed briefly or redirected rather than explored in depth.

Couples therapy focuses specifically on the relationship between partners: how you communicate, fight, repair, connect, and make decisions together. A couples therapist works with the relationship itself as the "client," rather than either individual. Couples therapy doesn't have to involve sexual concerns at all; people come for help with conflict, communication breakdowns, major life transitions, recovering from betrayal, or simply wanting to strengthen their relationship.

Sex therapy is a specialized form of talk therapy focused on sexuality, sexual function, and erotic and intimate life. Like regular therapy, it involves only conversation: there is no physical contact of any kind. What makes it different is that the therapist has advanced training specifically in human sexuality, meaning you don't have to educate your therapist, work around their discomfort, or treat sex as a side topic. Sex therapy can be done individually or with a partner.

At Deeper Intimacy Counseling, these three things overlap: Many clients come with concerns that are simultaneously sexual, relational, and personal — desire differences that have quietly eroded a partnership, intimacy that shut down after a trauma, shame that was never named. The work tends to weave across all three rather than staying neatly in one box, and that's exactly the kind of integrated care this practice is built for.

What kinds of concerns do people bring to sex therapy or couples therapy?

People come to Deeper Intimacy Counseling for a wide range of reasons, including: mismatched desire or libido differences between partners; difficulty with arousal, orgasm, or pain during sex; recovering from infidelity or betrayal; navigating sexual shame or religious/cultural messages about sex; exploring gender identity or sexual orientation; healing from sexual trauma; improving communication about sex and intimacy; and reconnecting after major life changes like illness, parenthood, or aging.

What actually happens in a sex therapy session?

Sex therapy is just like any other psychotherapy: you talk, I listen, we explore. What makes sex therapy different is that sexuality, intimacy, and erotic life are treated as the legitimate and important topics they are, not things to gloss over or redirect. We might explore your history, your relationship dynamics, how you communicate about desire, where shame shows up, or what gets in the way of the intimacy and sex that you want. If you're in a relationship, we work on those dynamics together; if you're coming alone, we work on your individual experience of sexuality and intimacy.

Do I need to be in a relationship to benefit from sex therapy or couples therapy?

Not at all! Many of my clients are individuals who want to explore their own sexuality, heal from past experiences, work through shame, navigate questions about identity or orientation, or simply understand themselves better as sexual beings. Couples therapy is available for any relationship structure — partnered, married, polyamorous, or otherwise. Show up however you are and we’ll explore whatever you’re working through.

What does "kink-aware" mean, and why does it matter?

Kink-aware means I have education and experience with BDSM, kink, and leather communities, and I approach these practices without pathologizing them. You will not be treated as though your kink is a problem to be solved or a symptom of something else. Many people in kink communities have had harmful experiences with therapists who didn't understand their lives or weren’t able to honor the important and varied aspects of their identities. This is a space where you won't have to hide or explain away who you are.

What does "poly-friendly" mean?

Poly-friendly means I understand and respect ethical non-monogamy and all relational structures, including polyamory, open relationships, relationship anarchy, and other consensual non-monogamous structures. I will not treat your relationship structure as the problem. We can work on the real issues — communication, jealousy, transitions, intimacy — without being questioned by your therapist about whether you should be monogamous instead.

Is virtual therapy effective for sex therapy and couples work?

Yes! Research consistently shows that telehealth therapy is as effective as in-person therapy for most concerns, including relationship and sexual issues. Many clients find that the privacy and comfort of being in their own home actually makes it easier to discuss sensitive topics. All sessions at Deeper Intimacy Counseling are conducted virtually via a HIPPA-compliant video platform and serving clients across 44 US states.

How do I know if you're the right therapist for me?

The most important factor in therapy outcomes is the relationship between client and therapist. I offer a free consultation call so you can get a sense of whether we'd work well together before committing to anything, and my preference is to get the chance to chat with potential clients prior to scheduling.

In terms of credentials: I'm a licensed psychologist (licensed in both NC and NY) and an AASECT-Certified Sex Therapist, which is the gold standard certification in the field. AASECT certification requires specialized training in human sexuality beyond a standard therapy license, which means that sex and intimacy aren't just topics I'm willing to discuss, they're at the core of my clinical training and expertise. I also have advanced training in Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), an approach rooted in attachment theory: the science of how we bond, what we need from our closest relationships, and what happens when those needs go unmet. EFT is one of the most well-researched approaches for couples work, and it's particularly powerful for intimacy issues because so much of what goes wrong in a sexual relationship isn't really about sex, it's about feeling safe, seen, and securely connected to your partner.As a PSYPACT member, I'm also able to see clients across 44 states via telehealth.

I specialize in sex therapy, intimacy, and relationship concerns. If your needs fall outside my scope or my approach doesn't feel right for you, I'll help connect you with someone who's a better fit and make sure you find the support you need.

I get it—starting therapy can feel like a big step. That’s why I’ve put together answers to some of the most commonly asked questions to help guide you.

If your question isn’t here, don’t worry, you can reach out anytime.